Thoughts While Sitting in an Aisle Seat Near the Lavatory on a Plane

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  • It’s astounding how many people don’t know how to use the bathroom on the plane. 
  • It’s insane how many people cough with their mouths open while standing over someone eating their food. 
  • Do they realize they can stand anywhere else other than the spot where their butt is in my face?
  • Why does this couple act like they miss one another while waiting for the toilet to free up?
  • Is she really watching my movie standing over me like this? 
  • Is she reading while I’m typing this right now? Yep. She was. 
  • How do you not know that green means go and red means stop anywhere on the planet?
  • She really is gonna keep pushing this door until I tell her someone is in there. 
  • Why don’t they just say someone is in here?
  • Oh, so now I’m the bathroom assistant now to tell people when someone is in there. 
  • Damn, she stinks. 
  • Is that airplane food that does this to people? 
  • Choosing this seat was a mistake. 
  • Is that a dead animal she has wrapped around her waist?
  • People are really weird when they’re waiting for the bathroom. 
  • Damn. Now I gotta pee. But I don’t wanna go in there after that lady. 
  • I used to enjoy the freedom of the aisle seat. Not anymore. Not with all these butts of people waiting in my face. 
  • The looks people give are hilarious. 
  • Pilot: We’re about to land. Put your tables and seats in their upright positions.
    Passengers: I HAVE TO PEE RIGHT NOW!!! 
  • People really should lock the door when they go pee. 
  • It’s odd how people think that as we’re landing they can actually use the bathroom. 
  • Like really, someone else gets up and looks surprised the flight attendant asked them to sit down. 
  • This flight attendant is knocked out. A 3rd person has gotten up. This is hilarious at this point. Flight attendants are strapped in and we’re hitting the ground any moment. 
  • I wonder if this is gonna be like that Key and Peele episode where dude hits the top of the plane because he wouldn’t sit down. 
  • Why is there an ashtray on the lavatory door if you can’t smoke on the flight?
  • This door is HELLA contradictory.

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